Titanic and Some Life Updates

I don't think I did a post last year on the 100th year anniversary of the sinking of the RMS Titanic, but I will mark the 101st. It's funny, I was watching the classic Titanic movie with Barbara Stanwick the other on TCM and had forgotten the disastrous anniversary date was approaching.

Now, let me say that I've been fascinated by the tragedy since I was a small child. The many mysteries...how did the ship really sink, why weren't more passengers saved, pondering why Classism existed in the early 20th Century...on and on.

There's a Titanic exhibit making its rounds across the States right now. Last I heard it was at the Franklin Institute in Philadelphia. Perhaps I'll take a visit.

Anyhoo, I know posts have been light lately. There's drama going on in my life lately. Too many slappy London days going on. Posts will continue to be sporadic until life calms down a bit. Work has been busy. Several of my friends are in a state of flux. Ugh! Have I mentioned taces?!?!?! You know I waited until the last minute to file, right?

As far as dating, Big D and I had been hot and heavy, but now that we decided to go exclusive, well, it's sorta gone from sugar to shit. I;ve been grumpy that we haven't been spending as much time as I'd prefer. Darryl constantly works! If you knew what he did for a living, well it's a commendable profession, so I'm proud he's helping others, but damn. Papa Red Bear needs some lovin TLC. I ended up venting on the phone for four hours with Pharaoh Friday night. I hadn't intended to do so, but Pharaoh has that talent for drawing out things.

In his analysis, my beloved li'l brother swears because nobody has "broken the cookie jar" there's maybe some awkwardness and undue tension. LOL. Well that might just be a little more details than care to know, but no, we haven't gone there yet. There are reasons and perhaps I'll expound upon them in another post.

That's it for now.

-Ian

Work It, Work It, WERQ IT!

Oh my, my, my. the animated gif to left gave me a good pause. Now, I don't watch any of the fake WWE wrestling anymore, but isn't that Brock Leshnerr? Um, yeah. Work it girl. I have no idea what the context this, but he seems a little comfortable in that sashay.

Anyway, just a few notes. Things are going well this week. The grumpy doldrums have give me a much needed break. Tomorrow I plan on resting a bit before a busy weekend. Saturday, Big D and I are helping his brother move into a new apartment and then Saturday night I'm gathering with my bestie for drinks at a local watering hole. Time to play! LOL

Sunday, well hopefully if Darryl has off, we'll lay up in the bed (cuddlin', no naughty stuff), then possibly do brunch or early supper. I'm so ready for a nice weekend. Maybe Mr. Sun and Brother Warmth will drop by for a visit. Lord knows I'm quite sick of Old Man Winter lingering around.

Happy Anniversary

Weilding the Axe turns six years old today! Happy Blog Anniversary. To be honest, I wasn't sure I was going to be able to mark the milestone. Ian just didn't have the passion this year. I took a long hiatus during the summer and before that posts were rather sparse. Yet! I'm still here. I plugged through and persevered.

My original intent was for this space to be an outlet for the side I don't often show. A place to let my guard down and just chill. Over the years I learned it's the wisest course of action to be totally transparent. Yes, I've had my naysayers, but I didn't start this endeavor to placate everyone else. I've had fun, made some friends along the way, and plain & simple, enjoyed the journey!

 So what does the Blogging  future hold for yours truly? Good question. time is a big factor. When I don't post for long periods, mainly I'm busy. I hope to rectify that in 2013 and as long as I have a few people willing to share in my adventures, share a comment or two, I'll be happy. I'm glad for the few people that do leave comments and give encouragement.

Since I began, more than a few blogs/bloggers that have fallen by the wayside. Good blogs. Still I have a few of my core group I kept in touch with hanging in there with me. I may not always leave a comment, but trust, I still read. LOL. I read more than I publish on my own joint. Again, something to remedy next year.

So for my bros in blogging who've become more like family, Viktor, Pharoah, Corey, Roger, Mardi, Della, and several others, thanks for the support and the brotherly love. For those who've I've fallen out of favor with, I wish you only peace, no malice nor resentment. Life is too damn short to carry grudges. Move on from it. I have.

I've forgiven and charged ahead with LIFE. As a friend often repeats to, the mantra I constantly tell myself when I'm frustrated,  "forgiveness is not about the forgiven. Its truly about the forgiver. By forgiving you let go of the weight holding you back, moving forward. Resentment is like peeing on yourself. It serves no purpose. Only makes you look messy!"

No truer words have been spoken. LOL.

Thanks for walking with me on the journey so far! Now let's see what's around the bend....

-Ian

Hey! Wassup?

You'll pardon my brief absence from blogging, please. Yours truly has been caught up and otherwise detained most of January. And here I thought the new year would usher in changes, yet it seems like old habits (and situations) indeed die hard. No worries. I'm regrouping.

So. 2012. Are you feelin' it yet? I'm still encouraged by what the year has to offer. I'm already plotting my next big adventure and as a suggestion from Wonder Man, Hawaii seems like the destination! My only fear is that's a long as plane ride. But if I can board and fly to LA, whats another few hours to Paradise, eh?

As far as my progress with my weight loss. I've successfully lost 25 lbs since starting, but it hasn't been easy. My next step is joining a gym later this month, but I will admit much trepidation due to irrational fears & insecurities. However, the good thing is I have a buddy system and three of my fellows have dedicated themselves to going with me. OK, good deal. So no mo' excuses, right Ian? Well now there's always room for procrastination! LOL

Kidding, but much like Jean Grey and the Phoenix, I'm taking time to come back and recreate myself as many times as it takes until I get what I want...

Work. Let Go. Release,

In a few weeks folks will make New Year's resolutions to lose extra pounds, trim the flab, and git physically fit. Hmph. Some will accomplish that goal and others will quickly fall away. For myself, I've been struggling with the path for the latter half of 2011 and I intend to struggle further still into 2012... *sigh* It's a daunting task.

I believe I once heard that Michelangelo felt his sculpture always existed underneath the marble, he only needed to chip away the excess to release the inner masterpiece. As with me, there is an inner beautiful person underneath the mass, I only need to undo a lifetime of bad habits to unveil my true self. Some days I feel good about it. Other days, I really want to abandon the effort and wallow in misery. I created this mess. How the hell do I get out???

I'm keeping up the optimism though. To be cliche, where there is a will, there most certainly is a way, right? Learning to love the body I'm in is a start. I don't have to love everything about it, just accept circumstances for what they were, and then make the change.

I'm holding my head up today. That's what I'm doing...

Some Quick Updates

I have a few loose odds and ends hanging lately. A few tidbits over the last few weeks I should bring everyone up to speed. The virus on my laptop was a bitch!After rasslin' with my laptop for a few days, my friend seems to think my computer is virus free. It was pretty nasty. Still not sure how I got it, but I'm pretty sure it was from one of those Tumblr blogs I solicit. Hahaha.

The job hiring outcome! I never did let you guys know what happened with the hiring decision I had a few weeks ago. Well, I prayed on it and at first didn't choose my friend because I didn't anyone to accuse me of favoritism. Well after struggling and carefully selecting my candidates, the primary choice decided not to take the position, which allow for my other choice and my friend to step into the positions. God is good.

McGarbage Man!

I fell this afternoon and gave into temptation. I stopped at Mickey D's and grabbed a McRib Value Meal. To say it was a McCraptacular meal experience is an understatement. *groan* I shoulda known better but I was hungry. Had just come back from the farmer's market and was in no mood to wait.

Yuck!

Progress Report

I know it's only been a few days, less than a week, but I wanted to keep a progress report with my weight loss. With the exception of the first day, I haven't stepped on the scale again. that would be self-defeating. However, in just a few days, I can tell with the small changes I've made, it's made some difference.

I've endeavored to still to a 1,000 calories a day and get as much activity squeezed in as possible. It's kicking my ass a bit, but I keep thinking about the final reward...

That's all for now...

Pause

Happy September! Can't believe it's September, which means fall is just around the corner. Where did summer go??? Anyway, I ran into some hiccups with recounting my story from vacay. Not sure if I should continue posting or just keep up with current events? We'll see...

Quickie Update

I'm sorry for the silence in recent day, but work has been a bitch lately. By the time I get home, I'm ready to fall out. No time to write when you're asleep, right? Anyway, I hope to text a post from work this afternoon if I have the time...