You Look Marvelous!

What is it about the turn of the annual calender that makes us want to strive to improve ourselves? I dunno, but I long ago stopped making New Year's Resolutions only to break them not only ten minutes into the year! LOL. Yeah, I think that was the year I said I gonna quit smoking. Umm...

Now, let's talk about realistic ventures for the next 3-6-5 days. In 2012 I made some progress with my life intentions, but I have far too many setbacks. I didn't let them get me down, but I didn't moving along as far as I had hoped. For 2013, I want to continue to make strides with my health, bettering myself. In total, I shed only 30 lbs last year. Not bad, but like I said, setbacks. I'm not gonna focus on the negative, only the positive and do what I can to be in a better body, spirit, and mind.

This is no resolution, not intention. This is life baby. And the time is now. I'm gonna take advantage of what there for me and as I say "Be Me, Do Me." 

What are your self-improvement projects in the next few weeks?

Happy Anniversary

Weilding the Axe turns six years old today! Happy Blog Anniversary. To be honest, I wasn't sure I was going to be able to mark the milestone. Ian just didn't have the passion this year. I took a long hiatus during the summer and before that posts were rather sparse. Yet! I'm still here. I plugged through and persevered.

My original intent was for this space to be an outlet for the side I don't often show. A place to let my guard down and just chill. Over the years I learned it's the wisest course of action to be totally transparent. Yes, I've had my naysayers, but I didn't start this endeavor to placate everyone else. I've had fun, made some friends along the way, and plain & simple, enjoyed the journey!

 So what does the Blogging  future hold for yours truly? Good question. time is a big factor. When I don't post for long periods, mainly I'm busy. I hope to rectify that in 2013 and as long as I have a few people willing to share in my adventures, share a comment or two, I'll be happy. I'm glad for the few people that do leave comments and give encouragement.

Since I began, more than a few blogs/bloggers that have fallen by the wayside. Good blogs. Still I have a few of my core group I kept in touch with hanging in there with me. I may not always leave a comment, but trust, I still read. LOL. I read more than I publish on my own joint. Again, something to remedy next year.

So for my bros in blogging who've become more like family, Viktor, Pharoah, Corey, Roger, Mardi, Della, and several others, thanks for the support and the brotherly love. For those who've I've fallen out of favor with, I wish you only peace, no malice nor resentment. Life is too damn short to carry grudges. Move on from it. I have.

I've forgiven and charged ahead with LIFE. As a friend often repeats to, the mantra I constantly tell myself when I'm frustrated,  "forgiveness is not about the forgiven. Its truly about the forgiver. By forgiving you let go of the weight holding you back, moving forward. Resentment is like peeing on yourself. It serves no purpose. Only makes you look messy!"

No truer words have been spoken. LOL.

Thanks for walking with me on the journey so far! Now let's see what's around the bend....

-Ian

Tom & the Tumblr Migration

Oh Tom. I don't care what people have said (seen some nasty comments about the young Olympian. Fuck that shit!) you do your thang and enjoy life to the fullest! Do the Mobot. Ha!

Saw this a while back floating across the Blogs/Tumblr. It's cute. I'm recycling some unpublished posts I had save in draft mode. Trying to make up for lost blogging time. Yeah, 2012 wasn't a great year for me writing-wise. I lost my voice and desire for a minute, but got it back last month. I've been quite eager to post for some reason. Maybe because I have more free time on my hands.

 I'll probably make the migration over to a Tumblr blog at some point in 2013. As evident with December, I've done more posting of gifs, clips, and pix than actual thought. I'm still not on track with my thoughts, still not secure in my writing.... So we'll see. I didn't start this blog to be famous (contrary to some people's opinion).

My original intent was only to use it as an outlet, to vent the things that I don't often share with my peers and fam. Has this been a successful venture? Well I laid out my burdens and was able to move on with many issues, yes. Have a encountered a few miscreants along the way? Oh hell yes! But fuck the naysayers. To hell with the haterz! As I'm fond of telling everyone else, "Be YOU, Do YOU! "

Time to take my own advice for 2013.

Caveat Emptor!
 -Ian

Hey! Wassup?

You'll pardon my brief absence from blogging, please. Yours truly has been caught up and otherwise detained most of January. And here I thought the new year would usher in changes, yet it seems like old habits (and situations) indeed die hard. No worries. I'm regrouping.

So. 2012. Are you feelin' it yet? I'm still encouraged by what the year has to offer. I'm already plotting my next big adventure and as a suggestion from Wonder Man, Hawaii seems like the destination! My only fear is that's a long as plane ride. But if I can board and fly to LA, whats another few hours to Paradise, eh?

As far as my progress with my weight loss. I've successfully lost 25 lbs since starting, but it hasn't been easy. My next step is joining a gym later this month, but I will admit much trepidation due to irrational fears & insecurities. However, the good thing is I have a buddy system and three of my fellows have dedicated themselves to going with me. OK, good deal. So no mo' excuses, right Ian? Well now there's always room for procrastination! LOL

Kidding, but much like Jean Grey and the Phoenix, I'm taking time to come back and recreate myself as many times as it takes until I get what I want...

Work. Let Go. Release,

In a few weeks folks will make New Year's resolutions to lose extra pounds, trim the flab, and git physically fit. Hmph. Some will accomplish that goal and others will quickly fall away. For myself, I've been struggling with the path for the latter half of 2011 and I intend to struggle further still into 2012... *sigh* It's a daunting task.

I believe I once heard that Michelangelo felt his sculpture always existed underneath the marble, he only needed to chip away the excess to release the inner masterpiece. As with me, there is an inner beautiful person underneath the mass, I only need to undo a lifetime of bad habits to unveil my true self. Some days I feel good about it. Other days, I really want to abandon the effort and wallow in misery. I created this mess. How the hell do I get out???

I'm keeping up the optimism though. To be cliche, where there is a will, there most certainly is a way, right? Learning to love the body I'm in is a start. I don't have to love everything about it, just accept circumstances for what they were, and then make the change.

I'm holding my head up today. That's what I'm doing...

Goodbye November! We Hardly Knew Ye!

Can you believe we're into December tomorrow? Where did the month go??? Seems like yesterday was just Halloween. But the Holidays are in full swing and soon we'll be saying Happy New Year. Wow. I think I'm just not ready...

So far for this month I did make some progress with my weight loss goals. It's tough and even more during the Holiday season. Thankfully I didn't go hog wild at the dinner table last week. The real challenge will start from here on out because December tends to be the free for all with snacks, treats, and goodies galore all month long. UGH! Help a fat man thru it Lawd!

I'm certain a l'il determination, denial, deep faith---the Triple D Approach, will help me come through unscathed. I hate trying to lose weight during this toughest season, but shoot! I need to get right with my body and stop treating it like a garbage dump and more like the TEMPLE it should be.

Nuff said.

-Ian

McGarbage Man!

I fell this afternoon and gave into temptation. I stopped at Mickey D's and grabbed a McRib Value Meal. To say it was a McCraptacular meal experience is an understatement. *groan* I shoulda known better but I was hungry. Had just come back from the farmer's market and was in no mood to wait.

Yuck!