So I haven't been blogging much lately. I feel bad about it, almost like its an obligation to the regular readers. Of course I realize there are plenty who come to the Axe to window shop for eye candy, which is fine. I haven't post many thoughts or eye candy in a while. Hell, I haven't even kept up with my usual blog reads or my email. I've just been blah lately...snap out of it already!
Despite not blogging, there's been much on my mind since I got out of the hospital. I've been home now for a week, catching up with reality. I did read one or two emails, one from a reader wanted to know what was wrong with me, if I had HIV or something. While I'm not offended by their concern, why is it if I'm sick, the automatic assumption is I'm HIV positive? I thought we got past that? This isn't 1988. It's 2008! Still, given how I've been sick for a long time, I suppose I can understand why someone would jump to the conclusion.
To answer the question to said reader, No, I do not have HIV, AIDS, or cancer, for that matter. While I am usually free and open about my life, I am reserved about talking about certain topics, especially my health matters. I have an illness that is not a sexually transmitted disease, but is fairly common, and on certain days, makes me less than whole.
Whenever I get sick with other illnesses (as I did in January and February with the flu and my upper respiratory infection) they exacerbate the problem to the point I can get seriously ill, and if not careful, terminal. Make no mistake, when I was admitted to the hospital recently (on my birthday, no less, dammit) I was very lucky. The admitting doctors said if I had waited any longer, I could have died.
But never fear, I'm here, better, heavily medicated, and resting comfortably. I do need to thank my extended family, my circle of friends, who were there for me when I needed them. There are way to many to list off, but they know who they are.
Now.... Where do I go from here? Well, since I have the next three months to convalesce, I suppose I could throw my opinion in on the Democratic Presidential Nomination battle between Barack and Hillary. It looks like I might actually vote in a PA Primary for the first time! Don't get me wrong, I vote, just usually not in the Primaries because by the time they get to Pennsylvania, decisions have been made. Not so this year. Looks like the Keystone State is gonna be crucial to either camp's possible delegate count.
You know who I support, but to be honest, I'm really tired of Obama and Clinton squabbling. Unite and defeat McCain! Does our country need another four to eight years of the Republican overlords? Why won't any politician admit the country is in a Recession? What about the drain on resources from the War? Rising gas prices? Unemployment? The mortgage crunch? Health care?
Oh lord! I really need to get off this subject....where are the sexy men at?!?! While I was in the hospital, to keep my brain from congealing into ooze from the daytime talk shows and soaps, I watched CNN (never Fox News though) and was inundated with all things Political. I'm tired of it all as I said. So, I'll try not to discuss it in the blog too terribly much.
Anyone watching this season's American Idol? I like Idol's approach this year, but I'm not fond of many of the contestants. Of course, I'm throwing my support behind the little bundle of cuteness, David Archuletta. Unlike Sanjaya, David doesn't come across as gay (not that there's anything wrong with being gay, Sanjaya just needs to be honest with himself) and actually has talent.
I'm not sure about the Idol contestants. The guys seem better than the women this season. Only a few contestants sit well with me however. My least favorites are Kristy Lee Cook (Legs), Amanda Overmyer (Skunkhead) and Romiele Malubay (Miss Will-You-Be-My-BFF?).
I also noticed there were plenty gay contestants in the top 24, but now they're weeding us all out. And what the Hell?!?! Did AI fall in love with the name David this year or what? LOL.
I won't discuss stripper boy, David Hernandez, only mention American Idol handled the situation the only way they could without addressing it directly. I've long believed Idol manipulates voting results to how they want.
While Mr. Hernandez wasn't the worst last week (certainly Kristy Lee was with her country rendition of Eight Days A Week), Idol never said one word about David's stripping past in a gay establishment or about his implied sexuality. Some cried foul. Remember former contestant Frenchie? Remember Corey Clarke? Minority contestants, who for some reason or another, had a speckled past and were booted. Yet, American Idol didn't dismiss a Caucasian looking contestant. Hmmmm...
Playing Devil's Advocate, Hernandez is a Spanish name, however, so technically, he could possibly be considered a minority. Not in my book, but others, may says yes. In my estimation though, American Idol knew they had to do something about David Hernandez. Because his of stripping past, the powers-that-be needed to address the issue, or the issue would've taken a life of its own and overshadowed the show. So, I'm sure they rigged the results.
On a different note... someone asked me yesterday if I "like" (translation: was attracted to) AI contestant Jason Castro. I almost choked on my soda! First of all, that boy is young enough to be my son. Second, I really don't like dreadlocks on white men (again, technically, Jason is of South American decent, therefore could be considered a minority). Third, I need a man (or woman, at this point I'll take what God sends me) and not a "child." Been there, done that with Napoleon, sold the rights, it was a bestselling novel! No. The older I get, you seriously need to be born in the same decade as I was before I consider "whatevah" with you.
The licentious skank in me though, does want you to know I noticed how tight Jason's jeans were last night. It didn't turn me on, but I noticed.
And saving the not so best for last, Napoleon....
Our "friendship" is done once and for all. I've stuck to my grounds and I'm glad. I need not say too much more but one factor that played an crucial part in my decision is he stole $65 from me, then lied about it. I'd bet the farm he did. But there were other concerns and reasons why I cut him loose. Despite being sick, I did break down and sleep with him back in February. I was lonely and a little desperate. Worse still, is we didn't use a condom. Argh. I know, I know, I know... let's not lecture me on stupidity. I know better. I got lectured by all of my friends. I got tested several times since and I get an AIDS test every few months regularly (not that much action is hittin' my doorstep, but that shit incubates, and comes home to roost whenever it's ready). AIDS is on the rise in the African American community and I was stupid. I used to teach people on AIDS awareness. I know better!!!
Hester and Lady Miss T understand though. They saw the charm and magnetism first hand Napoleon has. He can be downright irresistible. Of course Prince's song Irresistible Bitch comes to mind. Still, Naps is by far, the most selfish person to ever walk the face of Mother Earth. He's beyond fucked up for a myriad of reasons I won't get into. He wears you down, uses, and throws you away. I had to reach inside and pull out my self-esteem. I had to ask God to forgive and try to move on. I hold no malice towards him, I just have to let him go. What's the old saying? If you love someone, set them free.
Let's not delude things, what I felt wasn't real love, but it felt like it at times.
So do you feel sufficiently caught up? I hope so. I might just do a few picture posts for a while until I can get back into the groove. As always, live life to the fullest, and stick by the blog. Thanks for reading.
While this blog is not really intended to show adult content, I can't guarantee that an occasional image of male nudity won't appear. Be advised that this blog is intended to be read by people with an open mind. I don't claim any rights to the images nor do I have any knowledge of the sexuality of persons featured (unless they are openly gay...duh). Enjoy yourself and take a small step in my every day life and pondering... Feel free to email any comments or opinions.