Goodbye Uncle Martin

Instinctively when the phone rang, something told me not to answer, but I did. It was my cousin Freddy with bad news. Ugh! I knew, I knew, before even spoke it wasn't gonna be good. He called to tell me our one Uncle had passed away only moment ago. While it he was old, 96, the unanticipated departure of a loved one still stings. After talking to Freddie for a lil bit, I immediately started calling other family members.

Now I'm not sad, but feel the loss. June has been a month of departures. Wow. I guess I must be in a little bit of denial. But what I will remember best about Uncle Martin was his kindness and hies generous spirit. As a child, he was always the uncle who gave out candy or quarters to run to the corner store get treats. The sad part about growing older myself is seeing all the permanent fixtures in my life slowly start to fade away. The list of older relatives is diminishing and it's scary. Puts prospective on my own mortality. Wow. All I can say is wow....

Thoughts

I have decided, as I wrote last night, to delete my Twitter and IM. I'm in no rush to do this, but I'm old, have very few people hitting me up on those media outlets, so what's the point. Felt like an ass last night. But it's all good. Just goes to show I need to stick with what I know. Which isn't much, but the things I do best, I will fortify.

As far as Facebook, but I've decided to let people hit me up from now on. And no more "what's on your mind" updates. As if anybody give a crap about what I'm thinking. Probably will delete two of the blogs by weeks end, much to the chagrin of folks. It saddens me, but I think they've their course, so I will throw my energy behind M.A.L.E. and my creative team there.

I'm looking for good writers too. If you're blogger, and would like your voice to be heard, please contract me. There's going to be a few writers leaving us on M.A.L.E. soon, so I need people who are willing to contribute as frequently as they can to express thoughts on the male state of being, whether through politics, entertainment, gay and lesbian issues, whatever...

Lemme know.

probably will detete this just venting

I'ma speak my mind tonight then I'm gong the fuck to bed. This ain't no nice post, so don't look for the gloomy Ian, or the sad Ian, or the happy, spiritual, inspirational Ian. He's not here. All his usual eloquence has been buried along with the rest of good common sense people dead and buried.
*Sigh*. I will try not to cuss.

The BET awards were horrible. After all the hype and anticipation, I thought it'd be this wonderful tribute, but I see we as a people dissolved back into roles of yesteryear...coonery and buffoonery. Goddamn Plantation Mentality.

Young boys pull you pants up. Girls act like the Creator gave you intelligence and not big breast, which some of you, he did even do that. Learn how to enunciate. Don't tattoo yourself up and look like you just stepped out the state prison. And for God's sake! Respect your elders. They may be long winded and tired, but if it wasn't for them, your tired ghetto asses wouldn't be where you are now.

I'm so over it. Done with Twitter. MySpace. Facebook. And perhaps the blogs. If what I saw tonight was the definition to black, then I will happily claim my other brown skinned heritages in my Native American and Cuban American ancestry.

People pissed me the fuck off too. Sure we were all commiserating about the poor performance, but if I take the time to text you or Tweet you, have the Goddamn courtesy to hit me back or at least tell me fuck off. Sure my feelings my get a little hurt, but at least I'm not sending you messages like motherfucker, looking stupid. Shit!

So this might my last blog post if I feel like this tomorrow. I'm angry. Irritated. Annoyed. With others, but with mostly for myself for a myriad of reasons. Oh well. I got a lot of answers tonight and guess it's better to know now than to keep looking and acting the fool...

BBB!

Well today didn't turn out how I expected to be, but I praise God. In a bit of a mood tonight. Feel like it's time to quit a few things, and perhaps I will. I'm tired and for a change. I'm going to bed. Tomorrow I will have my decisions made, but my decision is pretty much made.

All good things...

Morning Praise

OK, so I'm up and sober now. Decided not to delete my previous posts written while I was drunk. LOL. It's hilarious. You get to see my multifaceted, charming, personality, for sure. Hahaha!

So anyway, it's all good this morning. I'm getting ready to go to church and watching Kyle Washington from BET's College Hill on Ustream. Got laundry in the wash cause I am not dressin up today.

It's hot and yes I am putting on shorts (tasteful ones) and wearing them to service. Breaks my usual church etiquette, but I just wanna be comfortable. And to be sure, God don't care what you wearing to church, only that your butt is a pew, praising His name.

Four am

Its dead and I'm still buzzed. I thought Twitter would be blowing up for some reason. But nothing. But that's okay cause I just watched Cocoa do a video. I'm so happy he's into vlogging. Maybe my fat ass should be a copy cat and do it too? God an havng hrad time seeing screen and tryping. I think I am beyond tipys. Time get hget off the compur, I'll delete this in the morning cause am I making sense yo?

BWI

Blogging while intoxicated bitches. OK. Here's the deal yo! I am slightly tipsy tonight...not the Sexy Spectacular kind neither (I wish)..but I cracked up the Rolling Rock earlier because I had to get issues off my mind. Oh I can't even begin to repeat half the conversations I had with people today. All of them totally unexpected. Let's just say I feel way damn good about myself. WAY GOOD. Only problem now is I have to worry about to deal with all this pent up vibes I got coursing through my head, through my body. What's a man to do???

I'm not an alcoholic. This is first drink I've had since True Blood premiered and I had those Bloody Marys. Oops wait. I'm lyin' like a mug. I went out Thursday. My bad. It's all my boys' fault. {sinister laugh escapes my lips} Yeah? Yeah. The Revolution will be televised.

Oh lord. I hope not. What happens in the jewel of the south, remains in the jewel of the south. Ain't that right Thaddeus? Thaddeus!!! Shh. Don't tell my two Southern brother bloggers, cause they gon' be mad as hornets.

That's all I'm gon' say.

Jeet-AH! Derek Jeter, That Is...

Now you people know I loves me some Derek Jeter! Happy Thirty Fifth B-Day Derek!

Day II Wit' Kyle

Lord, lord, lord! What am I doing to myself today? I'm on a emotional high today am three cents short of loopy. I was up late last night watching Kyle's U Stream and laughing at his antics. Yeah, I'm probably too old to be on watchin' these 20-somethings at night, but its classic fun right up my alley. I didn't watch College Hill this season, so I had no preconceived notions about Kyle Washington. I think brutha is just a regular guy, out to make it in this crazy ass world like er'rybody else. Don't hate on him.

And what is up with people on U Stream taking their clothes off?!?! Kyle almost had a few straight fellas drop their drawers until someone ratted out that there were gay men in the chat. I'm no snitch. I just sit there and watch, and where Kyle tell us to go, I go...

"A yo! Follow me. Follow me! Make me a celebrity!" If you watched last night you know I'm not talkin' about Kyle neither! It was just mad crazy. I got better once Kyle calmed down over his old-head stalker. That period was dry. Seems though the real fun starts after 3:00 AM. But you gotta be able to hang in there. It will be an all night affair. Don't worry, Kyle takes plenty "commercial" breaks.

If you have nothing to do during the wee hours, especially if you came home, alone and drunk, hop on to Kyle's U Stream Show. It'll make your day...

Hot Summer Night

I watched Kyle again tonight, but he got boring when he had his old stalker and I couldn't hang.

But it's hot as fuck and I'm typing this shit it the dark. Just finished reading a post on Pi's blog that made me even more horny than I was earlier...fighting down them urges earlier, but it hot and sticky. I won't get into my lengthy chat with another Blogger, cause yall would either start being embarrassed or knocking at my door! Huh! And my brothers in bloggers, Pharaoh and Thaddeus Works ain't did nothing but stoke the flames with their blog posts.

I am NOT commenting on either post. Nope. Keeping my innocent image intact. But Lawdhavmercy, but does the expression, "Turn a nigga out" mean anything to you? Yeah it's one of them nights fo sho..

Michael...

August 29, 1958 – June 25, 2009

Before I get Jawn Murray on my tail for not having the same shocking reaction for MJ...you have to follow Jawn on Twitter...I am still way in shock over this. I just don't have the words right now. I am calming down. God rest his soul. I hope in the end he found peace....

Angel For Real Now

February 2, 1947 - June 25, 2009

Late Night With Kyle

Will somebody tell me why in the good, gracious, Lord's name I was up last night watching Kyle Washington from this season's College Hill on U Stream??? LOL.

Not that I wasn't thoroughly entertained or anything, because I was, but please...I'm almost 40! How juvenile.

Now to be sure folks, Kyle is a mess! But he's a good mess. I didn't watch College Hill this season (it's last so says former CH alum Ray Cunningham) but everybody is aware of Kyle and his antics. But I found kid to be down to Earth and just like the rest of us.

Most fun was listening to him yelling at his boy Maurice to go to bed cause the kid had college orientation this morning. Or perhaps the back and forth banter with other U Streamers. There was some Miami Dolphins' football player I never heard of and some other 18 year straight boy going back in forth with Kyle. Or him watching X-Tube videos.

The whole damn thing had me howling with laughter. Lord, I said it already, I'm too old for this. Hell I can barely keep up with tweeting and maintaining my Facebook page. LMAO. What's sad is I'll probably tune in again, albeit, not all night like last night/this morning.

I'm tired as hell and in the real world, most folks have a jobby job. But since I didn't have shit-else to do, I watched from the wee hours of the morning until 6:30 AM, when Kyle signed off...

Been up ever since. No rest for the weary though. Got things to do, places to see. So lemme get of this laptop.... ***yawn***

What's a cat to do?

About Me

Saw this on D-Place's blog and am hitting him back with my responses. What about you, my fellow bloggers? I won't tag anybody yet, but I'm curious....Corey, Viktor, Toddy, Jimmy, Kishna, Ray-Ray, Aaron, the rest y'all... What's your answers?

Birthday: 3-2
Birthplace: Pennsylvania
Current Location: At home on the deck
Eye Color: light brown
Hair Color: black with a little grey
Height: 5'10"
Right Handed or Left Handed: right
Your Heritage: Multiracial African-American
The Shoes You Wore Today: shoes?
Your Weakness: Gooey chocolate brownies
Your Fears: Flying, heights, the darkness
Your Perfect Pizza: Supreme meat and veggies baby!
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Lose those extra pounds I been putting off.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: "LOL." and "I know, right?"
Thoughts First Waking Up: Prais e God, I made it through the night
Your Best Physical Feature: I have sexy legs. I really do. Probably the only thing I think I have sexy on my body, LOL.
Your Bedtime: Somewhere between 10:30 and 1:30, depending on if I had a nap or not.
Your Most Missed Memory: Some good times in college. Care free naivety of youth.
Pepsi or Coke: Diet Pepsi.
MacDonalds or Burger King: Burger King, but prefer Wendy's
Single or Group Dates: Single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee
Do you Swear: Bitches, I make some sailors and marines blush when I'm pissed off!
Do you Sing: All the time.
Do you Shower Daily: Yes, especially now that summer is here. You can't be funky in Summer!
Have you Been in Love: Yes
Do you want to go to College: Finished
Do you want to get Married: I'm divorced. If I meet the right person, there's always the possibility.
Do you believe in yourself: Not always.
Do you get Motion Sickness: No.
Do you think you are Attractive: No, I don't. I don't think I'm fugly or a troll or anything, but there is nothing special to my appearance, hence the reason why I am single....LOL. See I can laugh about it.
Are you a Health Freak: No. I eat healthy, but maintaining a vigilant exercise routine is a bitch.
Do you get along with your Parents: Yes
Do you like Thunderstorms: Yes
Do you play an Instrument: No
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Yes
In the past month have you Smoked: Yes. Oops, I didn't tell ya I started back up. My bad.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Yes, prescription.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Yes. Read earlier posts from this week.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yes Beverly Center
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Yes...I could live on the stuff.
In the past month have you been on Stage: No
In the past month have you been Dumped: No, but I ended a "something," which I think I might need to reevaluate doing! LOL.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Eek, nooooo!
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No
Ever been Drunk: Yes
Ever been called a Tease: No.
Ever been Beaten up: No.
Ever Shoplifted: Yes, a long, long, looooooooooooong time ago, in a place far away...
How do you want to Die: Preferably not alone and hopefully painlessly.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Happy.
What country would you most like to Visit: Italy
Number of Drugs I have taken: All prescription meds, about five.
Number of CDs I own: Somewhere in the neighborhood of a 1,000 or so. Maybe more
Number of Piercings: Two.
Number of Tattoos: None
Number of things in my Past I Regret: You do want this blog post to end right? Too many to list.

In a Boy/Girl…
Favorite Eye Color: Green
Short or Long Hair: Doesn't matter
Height, Tall or Short? Doesn't matter
Physique you like -Muscular, Athletic, Slender, a Few Extra Pounds, Large, Obese: If I'm attracted to him and he to me, it really doesn't matter.

Hairy or smooth? Smooth

Now what about you?

One And All...

Best Father's Day Wishes to all the special dads out there!

the fat lady (man really) is about to sing...

no pretty pictures tonight. no capitalization. hell maybe even no proofreading. today has sucked, pure and simple. i'm still reeling from my embarrassing moment from earlier and not happy with myself. i'm perfectly mortified and really wanna crawl in a hole and the earth plowed over me. one thing is clear, i'm soooo done with any attempting to get the things i want. so if they're meant to be, somebody else will have to hand them to me on a silver platter, and we all know the chances of that happening. i really do grow weary of struggling and failing.

grumpy? yes i am. disappointed? you know it! ashamed? to the core. i don't know how i can bring myself to speak to the guy again because i feel like such an asshole. and i was thinking we were on the same wavelength...shah. fucking idiot i am. i told ya, bad homo. bad homo am i.

i officially resign and am giving up. well maybe not, but its what i'm feeling currently. tired. tired. and more fucking tired of jumping through hoops looking for what everyone else has, stupid companionship. finding a mate sucks!

My Immortal

Yeah. I Get It...

Time To Say Goodbye.

I totally humiliated myself a few minutes ago and feel like crawling up into a whole and dying of embarrassment. Crashed and burn does not begin to describe my shame...

Seduction, Relations, & The Magnificent Dream

Good googly moogly!?!?! When the Hell did Pennsylvania become Seattle? The entire month thus far has been rain, rain, and more rain. I'm grateful for it, but dang... Can get a couple days of God's light from above? LOL.

Fortunately, I've been attempting to create my own sunshine. Been hollarin' at a guy for a lil bit now. Each time we talk, I become more interested. Unfortunately, I'm not reading him well just yet. He might be interested??? Not entirely sure; never been one to pick on subtle cues and gestures. The whole mating dance ritual makes me stumble and fumble. If you think my gay Spidey sense is bad, my pickin' up on peeps feelin' on me is worse. Sometimes you gotta hit me over the head and say, "Ian, I like you. Do you like me?" I'm so naive. So juvenile! Like I say constantly folks, I really do make a bad homo! LOL. When y'all gonna hand me the pink slip?

Never fear though. After a while, I do buy a clue. Hehehe. And to be sure (my catch phrase) this guy has me thinking about possibilities. Mr. X is cute, honestly sexy, closer to my age then my previous fella, he makes me think, and laugh. Not to put the apple cart before the horse, but I'm reminded of my Someone To Do You Right post over on MALE. While I don't know him all like that yet, what I do know is he intrigues me. He gives me pause. Mr. X is funny, has a delicious inviting smile, intelligent, and upwardly mobile. He can be a lil quiet and reserved, but he has a head on his shoulders. Did I mention he's cute?

Chile, I ain't got no damn time to "catch the vapors," as Toddy would say, but huh! I'm really feelin' this brother somethin' good. And I really need someone stable who gets me. Somebody who edifies and accentuates, not detracts. Somebody who can challenge me when I get in my snits. Encourage me when I am doubtful. Celebrate when I am triumphant. Isn't that we all want? Please Lord, I'm searching. Don' need no more drama! I'm not asking for forever (although that would be nice) yet I don't need anymore half-assed, trifflin, half hour workers on my 9-5 clock.

N-t-way....since I got in trouble for my morning message yesterday, decided not to use my words for the morning inspiration. Here's a reposted email I received from Jared (with his incredibly phine self! Now talk about cute, hmph!) today entitled Magnificent Dreams:

"What a shame it would be for your best dreams to go to waste. Do the work to make them real and you'll find great fulfillment along the way. Those things you love with all your heart are the most valuable things you have to offer. Truly make the world a more beautiful place by bringing your innermost desires to life. Even the smallest acts have great power when they are sincere. When your efforts come directly from who you truly are, they always make a difference. The world is filled with noise and confusion. But it does not ever have to distract you from what means the most to you. Again and again, connect with those real and lasting values. When times are good, and when times are tough, they will always serve you well. Your life is a beautiful and precious thing. Live the beauty, live the value, and live the substance of your most magnificent dreams."

-- Ralph Marston

stillness..

It's gonna be a long night folks...

Conversations Wit' Myse'f

Neither this evening, nor today, ended up being what I anticipated. Apathy chile, simply apathy. Shoot, so what' it gonna take to get my mojo back?

"Back? Nigga, your nevah got started!"

"Hold up! Who da fuck?!?!"Excuse me a minute fellas while I give the Anti Ian a beat down.

{ Cue noises of strangulation in the background!}

Look away brothers, this here ain't pretty!

O-Tabey. Now where was I? Anti-Ian has been following me around all day and I'm tired of his ass. A man can only take so much negativity in one life time, ya know? I'm not listening to ignorant side of my persona today. He's just wanna wallow in defeat and I really don't have time for that. Today I accomplished what I accomplished and I need to pat myself on the back for it. No matter how big or small the achievement, it's one less thing I need to do tomorrow.

"Yeah, well if you hadn't been online all day, flirting with them guys, maybe you woulda got more shit done." {Anti-Ian still gasping for air, evokes....}

{Blogging Ian rolls his eyes.} Okay, Anti-Ian's got a point. I did hit the blogs and social connection sites a little hard today, but I'm expanding my network. Did I exercise like I wanted to? Well, no. Did I clean up the bedroom closet like I started Saturday? No, those clothes ares still neatly piled in the corner...

"See!"

BUT! {Blogging Ian gives Anti-Ian the "you-bettah-quit-it-I-ain't-playin-wit-you" look} I did finish the laundry, cleaned both bathrooms, cooked dinner for the week, and called my job about returning to work... so score some points for a brother. And while I don't necessarily think I'm gonna find the love of my life online over at Facebook or anywhere else, hey... a little flattery to the ego, doesn't hurt none.

Got a major compliment with a guy I've been IMing and doing the "mating dance" with from a Facebook compadre, that injected tons of moxy to my self-esteem today, even got some real flirtatious offers (hence my Temptation post earlier this afternoon).

The most important thing for me is to relax, take my time in all things, be patient with myself, and allow the Creator to do HIS thang with me. As my body aligns with spirit, everything will fall into place. Love will come, if ever, when it comes. Not a second beforehand. Besides, if I cannot love myself, including Anti-Ian, then how can I love someone else?!?!

{Anti-Ian and Blogger Ian both nod in agreement.}

I Bit Into The Apple...

Earlier I spoke of the serpent in the garden.

Well temptation offered me a bite of his apple and I admit, I took a nibble. No comments on what I'd like to do with Mr. Serpent....he has piqued my interest... but gonna save that story for a more appropriate (translation: lusty) time. Probably by tonight when I'm sitting here in the dark, alone, and horny as hell...hehehe.

But I got an email asking we what went down with A since I hadn't discussed it on the blog. Simple, our time apart provided more than just physical space. Returning home, I realized there was too much indecision in my own heart to invest in anything, so we split up. Still friends, and I mean just that, friends. No friends with benefits, just friends.

In A's defense, he's got bridges to cross. I made the venture over some of my own when I was home, now it's his turn. He'll need a good friend to turn to for support when all the drama hits the fan, and I wanna be that person. That pretty much sums up the story. Nothing dramatic. Lord know my name isn't Kendall, although I wish I had some of his problems, but what's a fat bitch like me gonna do?!?! LOL.

In The Mix.

First, let me say this, God is Good. God is Good in all things! Do ya hear me? Say it again. God is good in all the things. Let the Church now say amen. Amen.

OK. That's said. Happy Monday Brothers. Sisters. I hope you woke today refreshed and encouraged to get through another work week with renewed vigor and purpose. Last night I had to chase away some nasty blue attitudes, but by Mercy's light, the sun is, literally, still shining today. And wasn't that just a blessing in itself? Shoot. After all the rain last week, I thought maybe it was time to build and ark or something?!?! LOL.

Now, to be sure, my spirit is going through some changes this morning. Not negative, but positive. The inspiration bug has latched on and I'm jus' feelin' it a little. So much that I can achieve and work on. goals and direction are coming back. I'm not looking to do big things, but the little things that someone else can do to build bigger things. Yes.

But now you know every Garden of Eden has its serpent, and mine is slithering with temptation a plenty. Oh it's whispering doubt, fear, shame, blah blah blah, but I'm not listening. I need to work through it to be where I needs to be.... Got some thought running amok in my head, will post those later this afternoon, but for now I wanted to spread the good word to you. Get out there and get into the mix today!

Love ya!
-Ian

wrap up

Greetings my cohorts in blogging. I certainly hope your weekend was a pleasant one. Finally, God sent some sunshine down our way, and I know I tried to, bask in every inch of sunbeams sent to Mother Earth. Course, now you know the weather forecast is predicting rain again for the work week. Ugh!

I'm attempting to fend off the Sunday Night Blues, but not fairing too well. I think it's cause I'm lonely tonight. Uh-huh. Maybe I should have rethought my position last week before I said goodbye to home slice. No, I did the right thing because I'm really no good in any type of long term commitment until I get my own house in order. My head is not where I want it to be, body is not where it needs to be. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. My life's story.

But true love will come around. This weekend I had the opportunity to see the Creator's hand at work and that's always a blessing. I know He's got something good up my way, just need to keep on being patient. But throw a brother a soda cracker in the interim. I'm lonely. I mean LONELY! The kind of lonely that gets folks into to trouble.

Ladwhavmercy! I'm going to bed with a good book, G'night peeps...

Sometimes Waitning Is All You *Can* Do.,

I have to remind myself that I'm only seeing the dots sometimes, not the broader image. I'm tired so my feelings are suspect. Not in a maudlin mood, but necessarily encouraged either. Two smaller set backs swung my way today. Eneh....

Ain't no thang but a chicken wang.

Sometimes you got just keep preserving and weathering the storm until you finally reach your destination. Need to be mindful of that ALWAYS, but would I be remiss if I said I'm getting nervous?

MD Says....

There are some mysteries in life that stay mysteries, and then there are others, that if you take the time, you'll learn as much as you need to know. Hmph. Now if I can only find out more, I'm one step ahead of the game...

The Truth Hurts

I'm so effing bored tonight it ain't even funny....

Rewind: Alexis & Krystle...Bithces!!!

"Why You miserable Bitch!"

Chile, I'm having a sever case of gay flashback!!! I had to post this one. I think for any gay man who came of age and into his own back in the 80s, this clip has gotta be the pinnacle moment... And Alexis was a nasty bitch, you loved her so. Uh-huh. How in the world my crazy black fool myself for so long I was straight?!?!

MED Thoughts on "44" (Thanks, Rippa!)

I saw this over on Rippa's blog, and I give brother full credit for his post! Please be sure to review the original article on The Intersection Of Madness And Reality. I'm re-posting here because it got this brutha to think and this certainly is a must v-cast for any Barack Obama supporter/advocate. Wanted to give others the opportunity to reflect and respond on Michael Eric Dyson's thoughts as well...

Do you agree or disagree with Dr. Dyson? Read my comment and response to Rippa below after viewing the clip.

"Wow! I was really ready to throw down and defend Mister "44," who I love and respect no matter what the staunchest critics say about him, but Dr. Dyson was dead on. Unfortunately, Dr. D speaks the truth, really, that to the older generations, having a black president may not matter! Washington is just a hot bed of game,contention, and mess. Pander to my neighbor so I can get what I need for my constituents or my own self interests. I'm not saying the President isn't a good man or without altruistic intentions, but let's accept there's going to be issues he'll sidetrack, back peddle, and perhaps, completely overlook for a time, until he's comfortable with the impact he's made on the majority (translation white people).

The President has to straddle a difficult fence. I don't envy him, but again, I agree with Dr. Dyson Black people shouldn't give him a "free pass." He needs to be held accountable. Believe me, as a gay black man, I'm watching and hearing the rumblings the Gay Community is having with Obama for not fulfilling his promise to LGBTQ community over DADT (Don't Ask, Don't Tell) and other equal rights for gays. They/we're certainly are holding him up to his word. They/we are demanding he honor his obligation he campaigned.

Should certain issues be sacrificed for the time being? Which issues need to go first? Does a lack to act firmly on minority issues mean "44' has forgotten about us? I don't think so. He has so much on his plate, but I think Obama wants to reach out universally, not to just one community or the other, which means some in the minority (issues) will get overlooked. Is it right? Hell, no. But it's P-O-L-I-T-I-C-S!

Here's a personal question I need to ask. As someone who understands what it's like to be multiracial, how is the whole matter of race, ethnicity, and identity seen by the POTUS? For himself? I've seen interviews. Does he relate as an American? Or does he HAVE TO because we've given Obama the "Black" label, strictly identify as Black (or African American in the truest sense)? We all know he's biracial, "mixed" as we used to say, but grew up in a different set of circumstances than your average African American. I wonder...

Now we've heard the jokes...when the President makes a mistake or slights Black folk, blame it on his "White" half. Is it fair that we hold him to a standard that he has to be 100% in our corner? Honestly? I wanna say he should because if he didn't have the labels in front of his name...Professor, Senator, Mr. President...you know the racists would just see him as another "n" word. I don't know. America speaks with forked tongue no matter what the community, what the ethnic group, we all expect something from this President that he may or may not be able to achieve.

I accept that he'll need to not offend white people, who to be sure, many will accuse him of giving hand outs and freebies to "us" (Black folk) just because of his race. HOWEVER... like Dr Dyson indicated, each of the 43 Presidents preceding Mr. Obama looked out for their "own people," it just wasn't necessarily said because they were of the "majority." And Mr. Obama wants a second term. What President hasn't? So he's gotta play the game, back peddle in some areas, to insure he doesn't offend and hurt feelings to hinder a second term. Is this right? No, but is the nature of the beast. That's why I hate Politics. Ultimately, no matter who the politician, their best intentions, isn't it all about personal gain and legacy?"

Fuck It! I'm Old, Dammit.

Sometimes folk will make you laugh at yourself, at your own inadequacies. True, true, true. In a positive way, of course.

OK, I'm not giving the full insight on this one, but it was made clear to me something, or somethings, I say are Wrong, wrong, wrong, and more muthafuckin' wrong.

Oopsies! Guess I faux pas'd. Break out the fags (think British here) and burn a bitch at the stake why dontcha? Vernacular and lexicon. Taste and taboo. Chile, please....

Now where was I?

Will say this much...honestly, I know I'm old and what I say sometimes might not jive with with what's contemporary or "in," but I'm a lil bit this and that, and to be sure, I really do (somewhere inside) love my big square self. Old is simply a state of mind. I'm not "old" as the expiration date on the milk container in my fridge. Up, my fat fucking ass need a "ed-ja-muh-cation" fore I attempt to run with the big dawgs.

Running? Or is it runnin'? Huh, what? I'm 39 years old! Do I really have time to doubt? Aw hell no...A little this, a little that, remember? Thus is so, so be it. Don't feel too about it none, neither. Oh and maybe it really is time to move back to the big city so the children can reeducate a bitch, no? Hmph. Too much white boy, not enough Negro, and way too bankrupt on homo fabulous, eh? REEALLY? {Ian chuckles.}

Oooh, you make me laugh with your words. Chuckle, cause it's true, and Ian can accept truth, don't have to love it, but definitely accept it. Sike! Now lemme take you off pause and release the lesson for today....

What The Heck!

Because I love y'all so much, I've decided to give you not one, but six "Good Monday Morning Men." Call it my gift to you to get through the day.

Thanks for continually checking in on your boy Ian. I don't know what you're going through, don't know your struggles this week, but I pray that the Creator will be with you each step of the way. I hope that your new work week will bestow good challenges upon you. Challenges not to tear you down, but to uplift, edify, and to strengthen; to steal your spirits in these difficult times.

God Bless my brothers and sisters. Stay vigilant....
-Ian

This Shit Is Too Funny!

Now I normally don't watch award shows, I think they're stupid, but thank you Drama Dupree for bring this to my attention on what happened at the MTV Movie Awards with Bruno and Eminem. Oh this shit was hysterical! You gotta also watch Drama's response too (here if you're not on Facebook)! I don't know who had me peeing my pants more. Bruno/Eminem or Drama Dupree.

I love it! You Gotta Watch! This Shit is tooo funny! Poor Zac Efron is like..."WTF? Oh, I won!"