My kindness came. It came in three ways today. I'm in a better place tonight than I was last night. Occasionally, my fears, shame, and embarrassment get the best of me.
My emotions tend to go into overdrive, take over, and stir me in unwanted directions. Last night was a culmination of reserved feelings and, in part, life situations constantly evolving and degrading. I was spent from being sick, the nagging cough refusing to release me from its grip. Everything cascaded and drowning doesn't begin to describe the turmoil I was experiencing. Again though, I am nothing, if not resilient. I feel more in control today.
Several overdue posts are lagging behind. I'm endeavoring to type them and have posted before tomorrow. Stay with me. If you want a clearer understanding to what has shaped and molded me, you're about to get it. I'm nervous because it lays me threadbare before you. Shame is such a nasty emotion, but sometimes you just have to put it all out there, and hope for positive responses.
Leoban sent me a quick note of encouragement. Another blogging friend has been reaching out and keep my spirits high, checking in, and sending me beautiful pictures (Thanks, Greg!).
So with that said, here come my posts based on my life as youth learning to accept my sexuality, race, and ethnicity. They're long posts and may take a while to post, but they'll be well worth it if you care to connect more with your blogmaster, Darktomahawk. Try to place yourself in my shoes. As always, feedback is appreciated, even if you disagree with my conclusions. I'd love to hear what you think, just be kind if you wish to critique my personal analysis...
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