While We're Absent...

"May the LORD watch between you and me, when we're absent, one from another...Amen."

Regretfully, I think my time away from Arturo has created a wanderlust spurned on by a wanting what others have. Yet, as my Gram is quickly to point out, "What made for other people, ain't made for everybody."

It's a harsh truth, but one we all need to hear loud and clear. Arturo and I haven't done much talking. Not about the pertinent topics. And I wanna go to Pride events in New York and Philly. This summer, while I have the opportunity to travel, these wings are gonna spread. I don't have time to be held back by doubts and fears. So where I'm going is anyone's guess.

There's much conversation to be had and yours truly can't square the blame completely on Arturo for the lack of communication. It wasn't until I discussed my homosexuality with my mum I thought a possible future, I wanted, possible. Doubt has been sitting on my shoulder. The green-eyed monster of jealousy, whispering in my ear, telling things I shouldn't believe. On the other shoulder, where I'd hope an angel would be, the nemesis of my past "fucked up" relationships, friendships, and marriage implores me to cling to the familiar.

But rise up soldier! Shrug them doubts, and have faith in the Creator, that what blessing He has for me, will come. All things in their due time....