Ian's Love Wish

"In And Out Of Time"
- Maya Angelou

The sun has come.
The mist has gone.
We see in the distance...
our long way home.
I was always yours to have.
You were always mine.
We have loved each other in and out of time.
When the first stone looked up at the blazing sun and the first tree struggled up from the forest floor
I had always loved you more.
You freed your braids...
gave your hair to the breeze.
It hummed like a hive of honey bees.
I reached in the mass for the sweet honey comb there....
Mmmm...God how I love your hair.
You saw me bludgeoned by circumstance.
Lost, injured, hurt by chance.
I screamed to the heavens....loudly screamed....
Trying to change our nightmares into dreams...
The sun has come.
The mist has gone.
We see in the distance our long way home.
I was always yours to have.
You were always mine.
We have loved each other in and out
in and out
in and out
of time.

The cusp of greatness is at hand. There's a feeling of joy in my being, a sense of anticipation. Something is a'brewin in the wind. Call me silly, but my soul has taken flight! While there's no one person on the radar, I have a stirring. I've been alone for a long time. Jaded. Sour. Bitter. Disappointed. So many past relationships weren't worth a grain of salt. Yet, I have to have faith. Believe the possibility genuine love exists.

Love may not last a lifetime. It maybe days, weeks, only a few months, but the real deal is out there. Waiting. I just need to claim it. Ask Him to send it my way.

At this point in the my life, I want and need to let go of all the prerequisites. The foolish criteria. The "have-to be's". I open my heart to what God has in store for me. Whoever He has set aside, that was His choice. No one can take it away. And sure I question as to the gender, the race, of the individual, but love is love. I only ask that I be prepared for what I receive. I'll accept it.

Whether he turns out to be she, is white rather than black, I ask it be real. So real. Let the longing be a fire that runs deep. That s/he compliments me; is an extension of myself. And while I attempt to set aside the physical appearence, let their spirit shine through. Please send someone educated. Don't have to be fulla book smarts, but at least common sense. No more selfish materialistic know-it alls. Please let them be wise. Strong. Empowering, loving, genuine, spiritual, and giving... glowing with the light and radiance of God's Goodness. Let it be from the heart, not just from the loins.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't want passion, fires burning deep, taking us to new levels, but I also want a bond between our two souls. I'm tired of meaningless casual sexual encounters. Please let if be free from malicious intent. Abuse Deceit. Over materialistic desires. Selfishness. One and all maladies that kill the spirit. Let love blossom with fruit, though there may be rough days. Let the sun set with peace, never bitterness.

ThoughI despise weddings, I've always loved hearing this passage of Scripture read at them:

“Love is patient; love is kind and envies no one. Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude; never selfish, not quick to take offense. There is nothing love cannot face; there is no limit
to its faith, its hope, and endurance. In a word, there are three things that last forever: faith, hope, and love; but the greatest of them all is love.”
-1 Corinthians 13:4

Indeed. And still, I deserve so much better than what I've settled for before. My days on this earth are numbered with each passing day; too short to be lonely, sad, or afraid. There is Joy in the morning. Let it be...