Last Temptation For 2007

I was surprised when my boss asked if I wanted to leave early this afternoon. I wasn't anticipating it at all. It was dead, dead, dead today. I jumped at the opportunity because I wanted to catch a short nap before going out to dinner later.

I still can't believe that this year is just a few hours from being over. Wow! Where did the year go? Time really does fly. I can't complain though. No maudlin posts today. 2007 had its challenges and adversities, but overall, I enter 2008 a little more wiser. That which does not kill me, makes me stronger. I learned some valuable lessons this year. Of course I can't recall what, but I'm trying to put a positive spin on the day and not be negative. Each day is a blessing, whether we realize it or not.

Anyway, continuing with my picture posting from last night, I was trying to think of a way to meld my blog thoughts with the excuse to post man eye candy. Then it cames to me. Myjah! Oh yeah. I saw brother man today and he had on the sexiest pair of jeans. This coincides with the guys I chose last night to display on the Axe.

Without being negative, let me fill you in on the busted situation. Basically Myjah is gay. He hasn't come out and said it, at least not directly. He's a circular talker so you often have to listen carefully to what Myjah's saying to get his point. In our conversations, I gathered that he's heavily involved in his church and his faith. Myjah is Pentecostal, a denomination that doesn't mix well with yours truly. He's gone a long way not to say he's gay, but drops hints like "When I was going to the clubs" "When I was in the streets," "When I was living the life... But I don't live that way anymore."

Um, what? Huh? Living the life? Isn't this a coy term I've heard others use to say they were gay? Don't you love just euphemisms? Yes, I contemplated he may mean a life of sin, but there are other gay indicators too. I've said before Myjah dresses nicely. Too nice for a straight man. Plus, Myjah breaks the eye contact rule all the time with me. You know the rule! Any time a man stares you in the face, in your eyes, longer than few seconds, it's a good indication he might be gay. Seriously. Most of my straight male friends never look directly in my eyes. They get unnerved and uneasy. Its a threat to their heterosexuality.

Myjah stares me down. HARD! Even I become a bit unnerved because the look is almost one of a hungering, a longing for something licentious and lusty. (It kick starts my ego someone feels such lust for me. It doesn't occur often, LOL.). I know Myjah probably had to put away his homosexuality when he was redeemed in church. If he was "in the life" before, when he got saved, he had to surrender his sexuality to God and fortify himself against sin. The verdict is still out for me if homosexuality is sin. I believe immorality is a sin, but is being gay? Does being gay equate immorality? Sure, if a gay man is spreading his seed with every man from Philly to Chicago, Hell yeah, that's sinning. But what about a gay, loving, monogamous, committed relationship between two men? Is that? I maintain I've not been able to reconcile my sexuality with my faith. Perhaps in '08 I will.

Whatever the answer, whatever Myjah's situation, I've decided to ease away from him and try not to let things bother me. We still talk. He knows my story. I'm beginning to learn his. But damn, he was lookin' fine as Hell today. No doubt about that. His jeans fit in all the right places and give perfect definition to an ass you could bounce quarters on! Just enough curvature, just enough back! He had my favorite shoes on with a snug, but not too revealing cotton button up shirt. Myjah knew I was checking him out. He turned around once while I was checking out the goods. I felt like I'd been caught with my hand in the cookie jar. He just gave me that smile of recognition, like his eyes spoke aloud, "I know you're watchin' me. Keep on!"